Horror, Sleaze and Trash.

the-weird-wide-web:

“No!” [Johnny Depp] said. “That’s impossible! I’ve never known a Monday night without a game on TV. What is the stock market doing?”

   "Nothing yet,“ I said. “It’s been closed for six days.”
    “Ye gods,” he muttered. “No stock market, no football—this is Serious.”
  Just then I heard the lock of my gas tank rattling, so I rushed outside with a shotgun and fired both barrels into the darkness. Poachers! I thought. Blow their heads off! This is War! So I fired another blast in the general direction of the gas pump, then I went inside to reload.
   "Why are you shooting?“ my assistant Anita screamed at me. "What are you shooting at?”
   "The enemy,“ I said gruffly. "He is down there stealing our gasoline line.”
   "Nonsense,“ she said. "That tank has been empty since June. You probably killed one of your peacocks.”

   At dawn I went down to the tank and found the gas hose shredded by birdshot and two peacocks dead.
So what? I thought. What is more important right now—my precious gasoline or the lives of some silly birds? –Hunter S. Thompson